So my mother is planning on remodeling the house. She sends me floor plans and wants to know what I think about them.
Since this is the house I grew up in, I have some feels about this, and so Sunday night I spend like 3 hours screen-sharing on skype to explain exactly what I'd do differently.
My mother calls me at work 2 days later to ask me to send her my doodled changes. This is a summarized transcription of what happened
M: Oh I see, I found them.
V: Yeah but I changed my mind, I actually dont think you should have a wall there
M: Oh yes, I wasn't going to do that anyway. Sometimes you can be very stubborn
V: I...what? /I/ can be very stubborn? How do you even..? That's like pot calling kettle black! YOU are the one that never listens!
M: No no! I USED to be stubborn, but I have changed. I am different now, not like you, so stubborn.
V: How do you even.. NO! I'm not talking to you about this at work, I have stuff I need to do. I'll talk to you later
V: Hi Mom, do you want to hear what I meant by...
M: Good you call Vicki, You said earlier today that I am very stubborn.
V: What? Are we still talking about this? I didn't even, YOU said-
M: But this is not true, YOU are the one who is stubborn
V: If I AM I LEARNED IT FROM YOU! Do you want to hear my idea or not!?
M: No but I want to tell you that because you are so stubborn-
V: OMG are we going to talk about the house plan or are you going to stubbornly talk about how not stubborn you are?
M: I have changed, and am now a good listener, but you are still so stub-
V: Goodbye Mom, we will talk when you stop talking about who is more stubborn.
(Tell Mike about the ridiculous conversation I just had with Mom)
(He proceeds to IM my sister in Taiwan while I go off and faff about online)
Tessa: but i think its a chinese thing to talk a lot and waste other people's time
i think the chinese view conversation as a zero sum game
"If the other person hates the conversation more, then I have won the conversation"(In the meantime while Mike is IMing my sister I receive an email)From: Mom 5:54pm( Reply:Collapse )
Subj: It will be your loss, not my loss
It is YOU want me to hear from you,
It is NOT me want to hear from you.
It will be your loss, if you do not want to express your idea.
From: Vicki 8:14pm (the instant after I see the above email)
Subj: RE: It will be your loss, not my loss
No its yours. have fun in your house.
(At this point Mike IMs me the conversation with my sister.)
The next morning, my mothers reply:
Maturity. My family is rolling in it.